Key Takeaways
- Modern weddings no longer require symmetry between groomsmen and bridesmaids.
- The average number of groomsmen ranges between 4 and 5, but personal connection should dictate the count.
- Financial considerations and venue logistics are critical factors in your decision.
The question "how many groomsmen should I have" is often one of the first logistical hurdles a groom faces after the initial excitement of the engagement wears off. In the past, the answer was dictated by rigid tradition: you needed an equal number of groomsmen to match the bridesmaids, usually flanking the altar in a perfectly symmetrical line. However, as we look toward weddings in 2025 and 2026, those rules have been tossed out the window in favor of authenticity, budget-consciousness, and meaningful relationships.
Choosing your wedding party isn't just about who looks good in a tuxedo or who you’ve known the longest. It is about curated support. As a professional vow ghostwriter, I often see the "behind-the-scenes" of wedding parties, and I can tell you that the number of people standing beside you significantly impacts the atmosphere of your ceremony and the ease of your planning process.
The Evolution of the Wedding Party Size
In recent years, the "Real Wedding Study" by The Knot indicated that the average number of groomsmen is 4. However, other industry leaders like Zola and Brides note that in larger, more traditional celebrations, that number often climbs to 5.3. While these averages provide a baseline, they are by no means a requirement.
In 2025, we are seeing a distinct shift. Couples are prioritizing their mental health and their bank accounts over social expectations. Roughly 85% of couples planning weddings for the upcoming year report that the economy is influencing their decisions. When you realize that each groomsman represents a direct cost to you—covering gifts, boutonnieres, and the rehearsal dinner—the "need" for a dozen attendants quickly fades.
Factors That Influence Your Groomsmen Count
Before you start sending out "Will you be my groomsman?" texts, you need to evaluate four specific areas: your budget, your venue, your partner's party, and your actual social circle.
The Financial Impact
It is a common misconception that groomsmen don't "cost" the couple anything because they pay for their own suit rentals. In reality, the couple usually absorbs several costs per person.
- The Rehearsal Dinner: You are expected to pay for each groomsman and usually their plus-one.
- Groom Gifts: A quality thank-you gift usually ranges from $50 to $150.
- Floral Elements: Boutonnieres for a large group can add hundreds to your floral bill.
- Wedding Day Logistics: Transportation (limos/vans) and getting-ready snacks/drinks increase with every added person.
Venue Logistics and Space
If you are getting married in a historic micro-chapel or a small indoor studio, a line of 10 groomsmen will look cramped. It can actually distract from the ceremony if the "crew" is spilling off the altar or blocking the view for guests. Conversely, if you are having a grand cathedral wedding with 300 guests, having only one best man might make the altar look a bit sparse.
The "Symmetry" Myth
Over 70% of modern couples no longer feel the need for matching numbers. If your partner has six bridesmaids and you only have three close friends you actually want standing with you, stay at three. Professional photographers are trained to handle uneven groups through creative, staggered posing. Modern documentary-style photography actually thrives on these "imperfect" numbers, as it looks more natural and less like a staged production.
2025-2026 Trends: The New Wedding Party Look
As we move into the next few wedding seasons, the "rules" are being replaced by "vibes." Here is what is trending for the modern groom.
The "Editorial" Mismatched Look
Gone are the days of the "uniform." In 2026, hyper-matching is out. Instead of identical black suits, grooms are opting for coordinated but different styles. This might mean different textures (velvet vs. wool) or various shades of the same color palette. This allows your groomsmen to feel more comfortable and reflects their individual personalities.
The Rise of the "Man of Honor" and "Groomswomen"
Gender-neutral wedding parties are a significant trend. If your best friend is female, or your sister is the person who has been by your side through everything, she should be in your party. "Groomswomen" or a "Best Woman" are common sights now. They can wear a dress in the same color as the suits or even a tailored female tuxedo.
Activity-Based Roles
Some grooms are forgoing the tradition of having people stand at the altar entirely. In this model, you still have a "crew" who gets ready with you, takes photos, and goes to the bachelor party, but they sit in the front row with their families during the actual ceremony. This keeps the focus entirely on the couple and reduces the "performance" aspect for your friends.
Real-World Examples of Groomsmen Selection
To help you visualize how to answer "how many groomsmen should I have," let's look at three common scenarios.
Example 1: The Micro-Wedding (30 Guests)
- The Choice: 0 to 1 Groomsman.
- The Reasoning: In an intimate setting, a large wedding party feels performative. Having just a Best Man—or no attendants at all—keeps the focus on the vows.
- Role: The Best Man handles the rings and the toast, but the "party" atmosphere is shared by all 30 guests.
Example 2: The Large Traditional Wedding (200 Guests)
- The Choice: 5 to 6 Groomsmen.
- The Reasoning: To balance a large venue and a long guest list, a larger party provides the necessary "heft" to the ceremony visuals.
- Role: This allows for a mix of siblings, childhood friends, and college roommates.
Example 3: The "Quality over Quantity" Approach
- The Choice: 3 Groomsmen (Uneven with 5 Bridesmaids).
- The Reasoning: The groom only felt truly close to three people. Rather than "filling seats" with distant cousins or the future brother-in-law he barely knows, he kept it tight.
- Result: The bachelor party was easier to plan, the rehearsal dinner was cheaper, and the photos looked modern and authentic.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
Choosing your groomsmen is an emotional process, which makes it easy to fall into these common traps.
The Reciprocity Trap
Just because you were a groomsman in someone else's wedding three years ago does not mean they have to be in yours. Relationships change. Your wedding party should consist of the people who are in your life now, not the people who were in your life when you were 22.
Asking Too Early
Many grooms ask their friends the week they get engaged. This is a mistake. Relationships can shift during a 12-18 month engagement. Wait until you have your venue booked and your 20000 Wedding Budget finalized. This ensures you know exactly how many people the space and your wallet can accommodate.
Choosing "Party" Friends over "Reliable" Friends
A friend who is great at the bar but notoriously unreliable might cause immense stress on your wedding day. You need people who will show up on time for photos, help handle logistics, and be a calming presence.
How to Handle Difficult Decisions
If you're struggling to narrow down the list, use a "Tier" system.
- Tier 1 (The No-Brainers): Siblings and your absolute best friend/brother-figure. If this number feels right, stop here.
- Tier 2 (The Long-Term Constants): Friends who have been there for every major life event and with whom you speak regularly.
- Tier 3 (The Family Obligations): Future brothers-in-law or cousins. If you aren't close, consider making them ushers or readers instead of groomsmen.
If you find yourself stuck between 4 and 8 groomsmen, remember that a smaller group is almost always easier to manage. You can find more details on specific roles in our Complete Guide to Wedding Party Roles.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does the number of groomsmen have to match the bridesmaids?
Is it okay to have a woman in the groom’s party?
Do I have to include my future brother-in-law?
Should I ask someone just because I was in their wedding?
What is the average cost of having a groomsman?
Conclusion
At the end of the day, the answer to "how many groomsmen should I have" is entirely personal. Whether you choose a "Man of Honor" to stand solo by your side or a crew of eight of your closest friends, the goal is to surround yourself with people who will make the day joyful and stress-free.
Focus on reliability, consider your budget, and don't be afraid to break tradition. Once you've selected your team, make sure they know what is expected of them by sharing a Best Man Duties Checklist or discussing Best Man Gift Ideas to show your appreciation.
Ready to Write Your Vows?
Let our AI-powered tool help you find the perfect words for your big day.
Try the Vow WriterWritten by Elena Rodriguez
Our team of wedding experts is dedicated to helping couples plan their perfect day. From budgeting tips to vendor recommendations, we're here to guide you through every step of your wedding journey.



