Key Takeaways
- The ideal groom speech length is 5 to 7 minutes.
- Use the "Sandwich Structure" to balance gratitude and storytelling.
- Focus on your partner as the emotional climax of the speech.
Giving a groom thank you speech is a pivotal moment in any wedding reception, serving as the official bridge between the ceremony's solemnity and the party's celebration. As a groom, you are the primary host, and your words set the tone for the entire evening. While the pressure to be funny or profound can feel overwhelming, the most successful speeches are those rooted in genuine gratitude and authentic storytelling. In 2025 and 2026, we are seeing a shift away from stiff, formal addresses toward more personal, "perfectly imperfect" tributes that truly honor the people in the room.
Why the Groom Speech Matters
Research indicates that 68% of wedding guests consider the speeches to be the most memorable part of the entire celebration. While the Best Man often provides the laughs and the Father of the Bride provides the sentiment, the groom’s role is to provide the heartbeat of the event. It is your opportunity to publicly acknowledge the support system that brought you to this day and, most importantly, to honor your partner.
Even if you aren't a natural public speaker, remember that guests are "positive listeners." They want you to succeed and are predisposed to support you. You don't need to be a stand-up comedian; you just need to be sincere.
The "Sandwich" Structure: A Winning Framework
To ensure your speech flows logically and keeps guests engaged, many experts recommend the "Sandwich" structure. This ensures you cover all your bases without losing the audience's attention.
1. The Bread (Top): The Warm Welcome
Start by thanking your guests for attending. Mention those who have traveled long distances and acknowledge the general atmosphere of the day. This is also the time to thank the previous speaker (usually the Father of the Bride).
2. The Filling: Personal Anecdotes
This is the core of your speech. Share a short story about your relationship—something that illustrates why you and your partner are a great match. This should be a "perfectly imperfect" moment rather than a list of your accomplishments as a couple.
3. The Bread (Bottom): Tributes and the Toast
This is the emotional climax. You will thank both sets of parents, the wedding party, and finally, your partner. The speech should always end with a toast to your new spouse.
Who to Thank: The Essential Checklist
One of the most common "social howlers" is forgetting to thank a key person. While you shouldn't turn your speech into a roll call, there are specific groups that require mention.
| Group | Key Message |
|---|---|
| The Guests | Thank them for coming and for their role in your lives. |
| In-Laws | Thank them for welcoming you into the family and for raising your partner. |
| Your Parents | Thank them for their love, guidance, and support over the years. |
| Wedding Party | Thank the Best Man, Groomsmen, and Bridesmaids for their help. |
| The Partner | The most important thank you; focus on your future together. |
2025–2026 Trends in Groom Speeches
The landscape of wedding speeches is evolving. Here are the top trends we are seeing for the upcoming wedding seasons:
Authenticity Over Perfection
Grooms are moving away from generic templates found online. Instead, they are focusing on "unfiltered" storytelling—referencing specific quirks, minor mishaps that turned into memories, and the reality of their relationship.
Joint "Couple’s" Speeches
Reflecting a move toward equality in hosting, many couples now choose to give a joint speech. This allows both partners to share the "thank you" duties and can take the pressure off a groom who may be particularly introverted. If you're planning this, you might also find our 1 Month Before Wedding Checklist helpful for organizing the final details.
Storytelling via Heirlooms
A rising trend involves using a physical object to anchor the narrative. This could be a grandfather’s watch you’re wearing, a ticket stub from your first date, or even a specific gift. Referencing an object provides a visual anchor for the audience and deepens the emotional connection to family history.
AI-Assisted Drafting
While many grooms use AI like ChatGPT to overcome writer's block, the key is to use it only as a "skeleton." A fully AI-written speech often feels robotic. Use technology to help with the structure, then use our (Marketing) - Tools - Wedding Vow Writer or your own notes to add the personal touch that makes it real.
Three Real-World Examples
To help you visualize how these tips come together, here are three distinct styles of a groom thank you speech.
Example 1: The Heartfelt Traditionalist
"First, I want to thank [Father of the Bride] for those kind words. [Partner's Name] and I have felt so much love from your family from day one. To my own parents, thank you for showing me what a supportive marriage looks like. To our guests, some of whom flew across the country—thank you. But most importantly, to my [Wife/Husband/Partner]. You are my North Star. I promise to always be the one who knows where you left your keys, and the one who loves you more every single day. Please join me in a toast to my beautiful partner."
Example 2: The Humorous Storyteller
"They say the groom's speech is just a way to make sure the Best Man doesn't get the last word. But honestly, I’m just here to thank everyone for not checking their phones during the ceremony. In all seriousness, I want to thank our parents. They’ve been our rocks. I also want to thank the bridesmaids—you look incredible, and thank you for keeping [Partner's Name] sane this morning. Finally, to [Partner's Name]. I knew I’d marry you the moment you [insert funny short story]. You’re my better half, or at least the half that's better at directions. To [Partner's Name]!"
Example 3: The Short & Sweet (Modern)
"We wanted to keep this brief so we can all get to the dance floor. Thank you to our families for the incredible support, and to our friends for making the trip. To our wedding party, thank you for standing by us today and every day. [Partner's Name], standing here with you is the greatest honor of my life. You make everything better just by being in it. I love you. Let’s raise a glass to [Partner's Name]."
Common Mistakes to Avoid
Even the most well-prepared groom can fall into a few traps. Keep these "don'ts" in mind as you write and practice.
- The "Inside Joke" Trap: If a story requires more than 30 seconds of context for the audience to understand, cut it. Your speech should be inclusive, not a private conversation between you and three friends.
- Reading from a Phone: The blue light from a smartphone reflects poorly on your face in professional photos and videos. Furthermore, scrolling can look clumsy. Use physical index cards or a printed sheet.
- Alcohol Mismanagement: It’s tempting to use "liquid courage" to settle your nerves. However, research shows this often leads to slurred words or inappropriate ad-libs. Stick to one drink before you speak.
- The "Roast" Mistake: While the Best Man is expected to "roast," your job is to "toast." Keep the humor light and self-deprecating rather than making fun of your partner or their family. For more on the difference, see our Best Man Speech Template.
- Winging It: Never assume you can "speak from the heart" without notes. You will inevitably forget to thank someone important, like your mother-in-law, which can lead to social friction later.
Delivery Best Practices
The way you deliver your groom thank you speech is just as important as the words you write.
- Practice at "Half Speed": Nerves cause most people to speak too quickly. When practicing, try to speak at a pace that feels unnaturally slow to you. To the audience, this will sound like a confident and measured delivery.
- Make Eye Contact: Don't just stare at your notes. Look up at the people you are thanking, and especially at your partner during the final tribute.
- The "No Phone" Rule: As mentioned, use index cards. They are easier to hold and won't lock or dim while you're in the middle of a sentence.
- Stand Still: Avoid pacing or swaying back and forth, as this can be distracting for guests and difficult for your videographer.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does the groom have to give a speech?
When should the groom give his speech?
Should I thank the vendors in my speech?
How do I mention someone who has passed away?
Is it okay to use a template?
Conclusion
Your groom thank you speech is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to express gratitude to the people who matter most. By using the "Sandwich Structure," focusing on authenticity over perfection, and practicing your delivery, you will create a moment that is both memorable and moving. Remember to keep it between 5 and 7 minutes, save the best for last, and most importantly, speak from a place of genuine love.
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Explore Wedding ToolsWritten by Dr. Julian Kwong
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